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Old 10-17-2005, 08:59 AM Offline   #1 (permalink)



 
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Default HHU Tabloids, Issue #2 - Big R's Date Gon' Wrong, Lesbians Run Wild, & DARS Exposed!!

Here it is...issue #2 of the HHU tabloids!

Lots of shit to cover in this edition, and if you are readin' from work, you may want to be careful on your scrollin'.....

Don't forget, it's $1/copy if you want to donate...got some sponsors for this week's edition, too....

On to the fake-news:

Big R's Date from Last Week: "She Was Kind of Smothering"



Big R had that good date set up for this past weekend, and he tells HHU that he was ready to get to business, "Shit, I'd hit up a buffet earlier in the day, got my royalties check from my latest album, Pastor Crack: Cracked Out at the Pulpit, so I was ready to get down!"

Unfortunately for Big R/Joey Crack the Don, ol' girl was pushing 280lbs.+, and the night came somewhat to a dark 'ending'....


"Man, all I told that bitch was that I felt hungry for some 'snapper', and I guess she took that as slang for poonanny when all I really wanted was some fresh fish from Red Lobster."

At press time, Big R was still short of breath and in the process of throwing up.


Snoopy Publishes New Training Book for Young G's




"A big part of my life is educating the young people," Snoopy said, "I've moved on from teaching how to impregnate these hoes--even their momma's, aunts, and other female kinfolk--and moved on to the special training that goes into pimpin'"

Snoopy experimented with training crack-whores that were older than 20, but said his finidings showed that startin' the "hoes" early was the key to successfull crack-whoring. Snoopy's new book and all of his others--Proper Ettiquette to Slappin' a Bitch; Yeah, I Know What Hole That Is, Bitch and; Impregnate Now--are all available for sale on Amazon.com.


1111 Found Out on the Streets of Orange County




1111, or as known to most "The Internet", was seen unbathed, un-attached to a keyboard, and wearin' a funny blue hat in southern California over the weekend.

"I'm looking for another board somewhere to MOD b/c I'm really slackin' right now with the 47 that I currently MOD. If anyone out there wants me to merely lookafter their Ebay items, doublecheck their vacation reservations, or read through some spam mail, I'm here for the job!"

At least, that what I decoded from 1111 in his statement. If you didn't know, 1111 doesn't speak English anymore, but actually has trained himself to speak and write in binary, so his comments were somewhat hard to decipher. (10010101100010111000010101100011110 = hello in '1111' language)


Quick Ad from Some Lesbians




We Rule!!!


Now, back to the news....

DARS Exposed!!!



"Yeah, son, I'm straight gangsta with it. I'm like, on a Ice T/Shyne tip, 'cept I don't rap about anything related to guns, drugs, cops, killing, bitches, cars, jewelry, jail time, or my neighborhood."

You can pick up Dars' next mixtape, Pillow Soft, at your local flea market. His freshman mixtap, Marshmellow Messiah, is certified aluminum selling 6 copies.


More to come, but I'm stoned and have to get some lunch....be back with a first ever Late Edition of the HHU Tabloids later in the day....
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Old 10-17-2005, 09:02 AM Offline   #2 (permalink)



 
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JigglezPooh is makin a streetname for dope rhymesJigglezPooh is makin a streetname for dope rhymesJigglezPooh is makin a streetname for dope rhymesJigglezPooh is makin a streetname for dope rhymesJigglezPooh is makin a streetname for dope rhymesJigglezPooh is makin a streetname for dope rhymesJigglezPooh is makin a streetname for dope rhymesJigglezPooh is makin a streetname for dope rhymesJigglezPooh is makin a streetname for dope rhymesJigglezPooh is makin a streetname for dope rhymesJigglezPooh is makin a streetname for dope rhymes
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LOL.....Hahahaha....Hilarious....Thanks alot Sooner....LOL
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Old 10-17-2005, 09:03 AM Offline   #3 (permalink)



 
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1111, or as known to most "The Internet"
.............HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHahahahahahahahahah ahahahahhahahahahahahahahh that got me...ahahahahahaahahhaahhaahhhhaa.....1's they clownin u....ahahahahahah
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Old 10-17-2005, 09:04 AM Offline   #4 (permalink)



 
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*Dynasty* is workin smalltime writing rhymes on the side*Dynasty* is workin smalltime writing rhymes on the side*Dynasty* is workin smalltime writing rhymes on the side*Dynasty* is workin smalltime writing rhymes on the side*Dynasty* is workin smalltime writing rhymes on the side*Dynasty* is workin smalltime writing rhymes on the side*Dynasty* is workin smalltime writing rhymes on the side*Dynasty* is workin smalltime writing rhymes on the side*Dynasty* is workin smalltime writing rhymes on the side*Dynasty* is workin smalltime writing rhymes on the side*Dynasty* is workin smalltime writing rhymes on the side
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LMFAO!!!


u coulda atleast posted a pic of some guy that dont look like he wearing eye liner
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Old 10-17-2005, 09:05 AM Offline   #5 (permalink)

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PT placed a downpayment on a new crib.. gettin that paperPT placed a downpayment on a new crib.. gettin that paperPT placed a downpayment on a new crib.. gettin that paperPT placed a downpayment on a new crib.. gettin that paperPT placed a downpayment on a new crib.. gettin that paperPT placed a downpayment on a new crib.. gettin that paperPT placed a downpayment on a new crib.. gettin that paperPT placed a downpayment on a new crib.. gettin that paperPT placed a downpayment on a new crib.. gettin that paperPT placed a downpayment on a new crib.. gettin that paperPT placed a downpayment on a new crib.. gettin that paper
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this dude.....i know weed had some part in that...lol
 
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Old 10-17-2005, 09:07 AM Offline   #6 (permalink)



 
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Harlem is pushin green in large amounts... gettin cashHarlem is pushin green in large amounts... gettin cashHarlem is pushin green in large amounts... gettin cashHarlem is pushin green in large amounts... gettin cashHarlem is pushin green in large amounts... gettin cashHarlem is pushin green in large amounts... gettin cashHarlem is pushin green in large amounts... gettin cashHarlem is pushin green in large amounts... gettin cashHarlem is pushin green in large amounts... gettin cashHarlem is pushin green in large amounts... gettin cashHarlem is pushin green in large amounts... gettin cash
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LMAO...........thanks for the news Sooner...
 
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Old 10-17-2005, 09:07 AM   #7 (permalink)

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damn...i aint make the news
 
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Old 10-17-2005, 09:08 AM   #8 (permalink)

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Old 10-17-2005, 09:10 AM Offline   #9 (permalink)



 
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1000000 points donated to Kill Whitey successfully!

@ the internet..........

@ marshmellow messiah.............
 
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Old 10-17-2005, 09:12 AM Offline   #10 (permalink)



 
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DARS Exposed!!!



DARS pic:

 
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